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Where Stories Are Made is a new feature here at Book Chick City. It’s where the author takes us on a tour of their writing place, be it an office, coffee shop or park and tells us about their writing day and rituals.
My guest today is speculative fiction author Sean Williams…
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Your honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury–I present the evidence gathered at the scene of the crime.On entering the chamber, one is immediately struck by a wall of cheap IKEA shelving holding a bewildering array of artifacts that, we assume, aided the perpetrator in entering the deranged state required to pursue his nefarious acts. These include one money-bank TARDIS, one stuffed Darth Vader, and one Dalek wearing a fez. Out of view from this angle are one plastic Voltron, one articulated Cyberman figurine, one Sputnik ashtray, and an original-series Battlestar Galactica raptor.
EXHIBIT A
Forensic analysis confirms that the shelves of the first column contain trophies collected as a result of the occupant’s obsessive activities–a “brag shelf”, I believe it is called. One must admire the brazenness of its placement: only a determined passerby could miss it.
Inside the cupboards were found further trophies, including manuscripts and newspaper cuttings relating to his exploits. The books on the shelves cover numerous topics and genres, some detailing acts illegal in this state. Many of these books have never been opened. These, we assume, relate to the accused’s future plans.
EXHIBIT B
Here we see the gruesome workbench of the monster himself. Note the new-series Battlestar Galactica coasters and the Devo sticker on the monitor stand. Note also the Maori spear leaning nonchalantly in the corner: one can only wonder what grisly employment this instrument has found in his dungeon of despair.
Judging by the recesses in the chair (just out of frame), the accused spent many hours in this location, seven days a week, going about his frightening plans. For evidence of his self-harming behavior, look no further than the Goldtouch keyboard (available only from specialist suppliers of this kind of illicit paraphernalia), the left-mounted track-ball, a headset customized for use with the Dragon Naturally Speaking program (another specialist item), a large container of Flexall 454 pain Relieving Gel, and other suspicious muscle-relaxing drugs. Most revealing of all are the twin electric motors of German manufacture mounted to the chassis of the desk, indicating that it can be raised to allow manipulation of its contents in a standing posture.
The crude attempt at recursion on the screen is typical of the mind-games enacted by this fiendish customer.
EXHIBIT C
The view from the desk captures the dungeon from an even more revealing perspective. On the wall hang the grisliest tributes in this gloating monster’s extensive collection: the original artwork of his first full-length exploit, Metal Fatigue, framed in typically brazen style; and a new York Times bestseller list showing his name at the top position (possibly a Photoshop; photographic experts are divided on this). Most damning of all, our investigators discovered two Shaun Tan originals hidden by the doorframe, plus two Star Wars-related hats hanging from the interior door handle (one flagrantly advertising his involvement in the notorious New Jedi Order).
Just visible on the right is an antique miner’s lounge, once owned by the accused’s maternal grandfather, later French-polished by his paternal grandfather, and now used as a repository for well-thumbed magazines, manuscripts, unopened mail, and royalty statements (the last shows signs of water-damage, possibly from tears). The space beneath the lounge was found to contain more of the same, revealing a relentless stratification of madness and despair.
EXHIBIT D
This painting adorns the wall above the desk. The work of South Australian artist Art Vanderbyl, it depicts a “Stoneage Ceremony” from which its owner presumably drew considerable inspiration. Dated “’76”, its creation is concurrent with the accused’s first attempts at writing–and so this, we presume, is the source of all the crimes against literature that followed.
We recommend its immediate burning.
In conclusion I offer EXHIBITS E, F, and G, detailing just three of the many dubious items uncovered during our exploration. Whether heirlooms, mementoes, or tributes, who can say? The full truth of what went on in this strange scriptorium may never be known. Perhaps it’s best kept that way.
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Star Wars: Fatal Alliance: Out Now
Astropolis: Out Now
You can find out more about this feature HERE
**Next time on ‘Where Stories Are Made’: Rosemary Laurey**
12 Comments
Brilliant!
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OoOoh how cool…..I love the space
My Blog
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I love stuff like this! Just call me nosy
He has a lot of great things in his writing space!
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I loved this!
I had a smile on my face all the way. Really good!
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Fabulous post! Thank you Sean for starting my morning off with a laugh.
xx,
E.J.
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Great space and a laugh too. Excellent way to start the day.
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This was presented in a fun way. I liked the various knick-knacks and the painting – LOL!
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THANKS EVERYONE FOR STOPPING BY!
AND THANKS SEAN FOR YOUR GREAT POST!
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Whoo boy! What a riot! Sean, you are awesome!
BCC, thanks for coming up with such nifty ideas/ posts!!!
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Nice bookshelves! Love it. Thanks for sharing.
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You have won an award on my site It's Time to Read. The award is: – the Versatile Blogger
Do come and get it!
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nice looking space. The commentary on the space is pretty funny. Just picked up the new Star Wars novel. Looking forward to the read.
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